Empty

. . .


I’m the space inside a pitcher.
A place between the walls,
Blanks where things are written
But nothing’s penned at all.

I’m the walkway through an arch
That leads off to nowhere.
A vacuum that’s specific,
Not owning even air.

When I walk the hall in silence
Not even footsteps fall.
If I break upon the seashore
The sands won’t feel my pall.

Belonging to nobody,
Going to nowhere,
My mind is all but emptied.
I just sit and stare.

Where are voices of the children?
Does music play tonight?
If so, I will not know it,
Without hearing and no sight.

Am I here or not
To fight the fight
Which cannot be assisted
By any passerby?
I’m alone, my mind is twisted.
I am stillness after a sigh.

A cavern in the desert.
Silence between words.
The touch that isn’t given.
A heart that dies unheard.


Frankie Jasmine
09-27-2012


If you like this poem, please visit my poems pages . . . where I post all on ATL . . . (Recent poems begin with Post #93):

http://www.allthelyrics.com/forum/po...roverbs-5.html

Frankie,this is amazing.When I first read the line,"The sands won't feel my pall" I read(in my head)"The sands won't fill my pail"!
Oh well,it was close!I guess I'll always be "a Jack and Jill"guy.

http://www.allthelyrics.com/forum/po...tml#post969099
I love this! <3

Hi F. J., sometimes pain or sufering make amazing and beautiful things, like this. I can imagine the artist, feeling blue and lonely, with a broken heart. The line I liked more is when you say "blanks where things are written", it creates a wonderful image in my mind. I don´t know if this poem is recent, but it shows that you are growing more and more as a great writer. Thank you.

Frankie,
This is amazing! I want to apologize for not reading more of your pieces- I'm still unfamiliar with the tech. involved on atl....checking my mailbox, etc...I'm learning!!
"A heart the dies unheard..." that is an incredible testament to your ability to keep the reader engaged and leave them with an ending that sticks in your mind. I feel your depression, your lonliness, and I respect your vulnerability that you courageously exposed! I love this piece on so many different levels! Your AMAZING grasp of the English Language and how well-read you are, and how you are able to channel your pain and use your writing as a module to express it, release it, share it, and then 'be the stillness after a sigh".....LOVE IT!!!

Originally Posted by mexico62

Hi F. J., sometimes pain or sufering make amazing and beautiful things, like this. I can imagine the artist, feeling blue and lonely, with a broken heart. The line I liked more is when you say "blanks where things are written", it creates a wonderful image in my mind. I don´t know if this poem is recent, but it shows that you are growing more and more as a great writer. Thank you.

I agree...I'm not sure when this piece was written either, but the imagery is at a very professional level. First, I envision the outcast in a bathroom stall, then a lonely, and confused woman who is beautiful, but does not know it, rolling around in the sand...ending with one teardrop slowly trickling down her eye

Originally Posted by Doug Denslowe

Frankie,this is amazing.When I first read the line,"The sands won't feel my pall" I read(in my head)"The sands won't fill my pail"!
Oh well,it was close!I guess I'll always be "a Jack and Jill"guy.

LOL!!! This is so "you" Dougie!! I love how you incorporated "jack and jill" in your critique...yeah, you did miss the boat....but, you're happy rolling down the hill with your pail!!!

How have I not read this Frankie, I think you perfectly described what emptiness is here. It is satisfying in a sense....because it rings so true.

This is one of those pieces that "hits me" in a different way every time!The thing is this;I don't have quite the words to describe what I feel........I know I like what I read,but I still feel.........empty.I've never been as good at critiquing a piece as writing one.I know if I like it or not,but I think this deserves more.........okay,I Love it!

Originally Posted by Doug Denslowe

This is one of those pieces that "hits me" in a different way every time!The thing is this;I don't have quite the words to describe what I feel........I know I like what I read,but I still feel.........empty.I've never been as good at critiquing a piece as writing one.I know if I like it or not,but I think this deserves more.........okay,I Love it!

Doug, sometimes poems or songs that are SO good in a more complex way- we find ourselves speechless..Frankie takes us on a journey in this piece, I think it's beautiful....and the title is the bow on the package..she really nailed it on this one..

Originally Posted by jessie zuppo

Doug, sometimes poems or songs that are SO good in a more complex way- we find ourselves speechless..Frankie takes us on a journey in this piece, I think it's beautiful....and the title is the bow on the package..she really nailed it on this one..

I'm glad you know me so well that you can say what I'm thinking!I agree 100%!!!