Albanian English translation please

hello, could someone please translate this very very VERY long text into english? i would appreciate it a lot!

E filloje kete leter me shkruar per ty,me fjalet me te embla te zemres dhe shpirtit time te lenduar.
Ne keto qaste kur e shkruaj ndjehem e emocionuar,me merzi ,pikllim,dhe vuajtje te pafund brenda zemres sime,dhe me lot te pa ndal ne syt e mi te permalluar per nje dashuri..

Kur nuk do te mundem tia fal vetes nese diqka gabova me ty ,e nuk po di gje qka beri ndryshim te madh ne mes nesh, kur nuk desha te lendoj as veten time.
Tash vazhdoj te qaj ditet, e rinissime qe me iken e kur me nuk kthehen prap,asnjeher ne jete se desha interesin qdo here dashurova me shpirt e me zemer te paster.sa do qe po mundona si duket ruget tona nuk po takohen askund,se si ndihem une tani ,te tregon vete letra e shkruar,kur nuk e kam menduar nje dashuri te till qe te bene te vuash me mall dhe ne heshtje....
Nese eshte shkruar qe kur mos te takoj dhe te theme qe ne kater sy ate qka ndjeje per ty ne zemer,do te pajtohem me kete fakt ,edhe pse eshte shum e rend per mua ,mos haro kur se vetem ty te dua.
Jeta ime tash shum ka ndryshuar ne zemer me ka mbetur plaga e tradhtise ne vitet e dashurise se humbur mbeta vetem nje rob i dashurise

Kurr ndoshta skam ditur te shkruja po rmalli dhe humbja e juaj e shtyri shpirtin , mendjen dhe doren time qe dridhet te filloj te shkruajper kete dashuri.
Qe tani e tretur dhe e humbur ne detin pa fund.
Kaloj kohe te gjat qe nga ndarje e juaj une kam mbetur vetem nje figure njeri qe ekzistoj,shpresat me jane fikur tersishte , te jetoj apo te mos jetoj , te jetoj e te pres tani zoti se qpo me dergon ndojne te mire apo te keqe, ndonje gezim apo hidherim, ndonje vuajtje apo dashuri , tani te gjitha I pres nga zoti.
Te gjithe njerzit me gjykojn per dashurine tende e une mbetem vetem.
Nuk gaboj kurr qe te deshta aq shume.
Zemra ime dhe dashurija ndaj teje me shtyri te kaloj qaste te kendeshme me ty, ne ato momente dhe ne ate koh kur ne dashurohemi, nuk pata menduar nje ndareje te till qe tani kane mbetur vetem kujtime,kujtime qe me sillen gjdo dite, gjdo net ne mendje, dhe tani nuk ka se kush te me ngushlloj perveq loteve te mi qe ndoshta kurr nuk do te ndalen.
Gaboj apo sgaboj nuk e di, edhe po te dua te mos qaj lotet prap me rrjedhin.
Jam e lindur duke qar, u rrita me nje lumturi famijare dhe kur fillova dashurin ather isha edhe ma e lumtur nuk mendoj se kurr se mbas nje kohe do te mallkoj kete dashuri , nuk e mendoja se do te derdhi lot dhe do te vajtoj ket dashuri , tani vetem zoti mund te dij se a kam gabuar, a kam qene ne rrug te drejt , se ndoshta edhe se e kam humbur kete dashuri dhe at njeri qe e dashta me se shumeti per deshiren time une kisha vdekur , edhe une mbas te gjithave pata deshir te humbi te tretem diku thell ne dhe, te me kalbet kjo bukuri ne toke se mbasi nuk me done askush, insektet e dheut ndoshta do te ishin ngopur me trupin tim ne ket zemer qe kurr askujt sja mendoj te keqen.
Ndoshta ather askend sdo ta pengoj por ndoshta te gjith do te pendohet dhe do te bindet se qfare kam qen, sepse ne ate bote nuk ka genjeshtra , atje ka drejtesi , atje do te mesoni realitetin e jetes sime dhe do te bindeni se qfar kam qen.
Mos ju lutem mos me beni te vdes , mos me shiqoni me inat, qfar kam ber prap pyes vehetn qfar, qfar kam ber.
Ne vend te fjaleve te ngushllimit te te gjith me thonin fjale fyese.
Mosni se kam ber humbje me deshiren time ajo deshi keshtu , ajo u largua nga une , nga shpirti im I mjer, ai murr rrugen te pa kthim ne zemren time la nje plag qe nuk sherohet kurr , dhe tani edhe mos te qajn syte qane zemra ime qe tani as te qet nuk e lejne te loton por endrrojn per nje kohe te shkurte me ato fjale tronditese, po qe edhe te kisha zemer te hekur prap do te rrjetheshin lotete .
Do te me thahen te gjithe dejzit e zemres dhe trupi tim do te me I vije vdekja dalngadal e ju o njerz ( pa zemer)knaqeni zemren tuaj duke me shikuar duke vdekur dhe lutem ather kur une jam ne mes te vdekjes dhe jetes mos qani per mua.
Se mbasi jam nje njeri pa zemer ather ma mira e kesaj jete eshte te zgjedhi RRUGEN E VDEKJES

Tash e perfundoj kete leter me shpres se e ke kuptuar d.m.th.e saj ,mbetesh i pershendetur nga une ,duke te uruar nga zemra gjitha te mira...

I did my best it was really long lol : )

E filloje kete leter me shkruar per ty,me fjalet me te embla te zemres dhe shpirtit time te lenduar.
I start this letter off by writing about you, using the sweetest words of the heart and soul which is hurt.

Ne keto qaste kur e shkruaj ndjehem e emocionuar,me merzi ,pikllim,dhe vuajtje te pafund brenda zemres sime,dhe me lot te pa ndal ne syt e mi te permalluar per nje dashuri..
In these moments i am writing i feel very emotional, upset, with never ending sadness and grief in my heart, and with unstoppable tears in my heart yearning for a(this) love.

Kur nuk do te mundem tia fal vetes nese diqka gabova me ty ,e nuk po di gje qka beri ndryshim te madh ne mes nesh, kur nuk desha te lendoj as veten time.
i would never be able to forgive myself if i made a mistake by you, and i don't know anything that has made this big difference between us, i never wanted to hurt myself either.

Tash vazhdoj te qaj ditet, e rinissime qe me iken e kur me nuk kthehen prap,asnjeher ne jete se desha interesin qdo here dashurova me shpirt e me zemer te paster.sa do qe po mundona si duket ruget tona nuk po takohen askund,se si ndihem une tani ,te tregon vete letra e shkruar,kur nuk e kam menduar nje dashuri te till qe te bene te vuash me mall dhe ne heshtje....
Nese eshte shkruar qe kur mos te takoj dhe te theme qe ne kater sy ate qka ndjeje per ty ne zemer,do te pajtohem me kete fakt ,edhe pse eshte shum e rend per mua ,mos haro kur se vetem ty te dua.
Now i continue to cry for the days of my youth that have left me and will never return. i was never interested in the benefits(interests) i always loved with my soul and with my pure heart. as hard as i tried it looks as if our roads do not meet anywhere, cause this letter alone shows you how i feel right now. I have never thought of a love like this that makes you suffer with longing and leaves you in silence. If fate has written for me to never to meet you, and i tell you what i feel in [lit. four eyes - meaning - what i anxiously feel] for you in my heart, and i will stand by this fact, and also because it is very difficult for me, don't even forget that i only love you.

Jeta ime tash shum ka ndryshuar ne zemer me ka mbetur plaga e tradhtise ne vitet e dashurise se humbur mbeta vetem nje rob i dashurise
My life has changed a lot now, in my heart remains the wound of betrayal. in the years of lost love i remained only a prisoner of love.

Kurr ndoshta skam ditur te shkruja po rmalli dhe humbja e juaj e shtyri shpirtin , mendjen dhe doren time qe dridhet te filloj te shkruajper kete dashuri.
at a time that i had not known how to write, my longing and your missing encouraged my soul, my mind and hand that shakes to begin to write about this love.

Qe tani e tretur dhe e humbur ne detin pa fund.
that is now melted and lost in the sea endlessly

Kaloj kohe te gjat qe nga ndarje e juaj une kam mbetur vetem nje figure njeri qe ekzistoj,shpresat me jane fikur tersishte , te jetoj apo te mos jetoj , te jetoj e te pres tani zoti se qpo me dergon ndojne te mire apo te keqe, ndonje gezim apo hidherim, ndonje vuajtje apo dashuri , tani te gjitha I pres nga zoti.
Te gjithe njerzit me gjykojn per dashurine tende e une mbetem vetem.
Nuk gaboj kurr qe te deshta aq shume.
time has past from your separation and i have remained only the figure of a person that exists, my hopes are extinguished in the darkness, to live or not to live, now to live and to wait for what god will send my way either good or bad, a happiness or a bitterness, a grievance or a love, now i wait for everything from god.
everyone judges me for your love and i can only stay still. it couldn't have been a mistake when i had loved you as much as i did .

Zemra ime dhe dashurija ndaj teje me shtyri te kaloj qaste te kendeshme me ty, ne ato momente dhe ne ate koh kur ne dashurohemi, nuk pata menduar nje ndareje te till qe tani kane mbetur vetem kujtime,kujtime qe me sillen gjdo dite, gjdo net ne mendje, dhe tani nuk ka se kush te me ngushlloj perveq loteve te mi qe ndoshta kurr nuk do te ndalen.
my yeart and this love between us pushed me to live through nice moments with you, in those moments and at that time when we loved each other, i had never thought of a separation of this kind, that not only leaves memories, memories that return every day, every night to my mind, and now there is no one to console me besides my tears that might not ever stop.


I will translate the rest later! : )

Sorry to steal your thunder Balkaneuro
i was bored ;/
( i tried to stick to your format)
feel free to correct




Gaboj apo sgaboj nuk e di, edhe po te dua te mos qaj lotet prap me rrjedhin.
Whether i am mistaken or not i dont know, even if i dont want to cry the tears still flow.

Jam e lindur duke qar, u rrita me nje lumturi famijare dhe kur fillova dashurin ather isha edhe ma e lumtur nuk mendoj se kurr se mbas nje kohe do te mallkoj kete dashuri , nuk e mendoja se do te derdhi lot dhe do te vajtoj ket dashuri , tani vetem zoti mund te dij se a kam gabuar, a kam qene ne rrug te drejt , se ndoshta edhe se e kam humbur kete dashuri dhe at njeri qe e dashta me se shumeti per deshiren time une kisha vdekur , edhe une mbas te gjithave pata deshir te humbi te tretem diku thell ne dhe, te me kalbet kjo bukuri ne toke se mbasi nuk me done askush, insektet e dheut ndoshta do te ishin ngopur me trupin tim ne ket zemer qe kurr askujt sja mendoj te keqen.
I was crying when born, i grew up with a families blisfulness and when i began to love i was even happier, and i never though that after some time i would curse this love, i didnt think i would shed tears and mourn this love, now only god knows if i was mistaking, if i was on the right path, because maybe even though i lost this love and that person that i loved so much for myself i had died, and I, after everything had the desire to get lost, to dissolve somewhere deep in the group, so that this beauty rottens on earth because maybe nobody loved me, maybe the soils insects would be satisfied (full) with my body and this heart of mine that never wished bad on anyone.

Ndoshta ather askend sdo ta pengoj por ndoshta te gjith do te pendohet dhe do te bindet se qfare kam qen, sepse ne ate bote nuk ka genjeshtra , atje ka drejtesi , atje do te mesoni realitetin e jetes sime dhe do te bindeni se qfar kam qen.
Mos ju lutem mos me beni te vdes , mos me shiqoni me inat, qfar kam ber prap pyes vehetn qfar, qfar kam ber.
Ne vend te fjaleve te ngushllimit te te gjith me thonin fjale fyese.
Maybe that way i wont bother anyone but maybe everyone will repent and they will be convinced on what kind of person i was, because in that world there is no lies, there is justice, there you would understand my lifes reality and you would be convinced about the kind of person i was. I wouldnt plead dont make me die, dont look at me with anger...what have i done i ask myself again, what have i done. Instead of words of condolence everyone said hurtful words.

Mosni se kam ber humbje me deshiren time ajo deshi keshtu , ajo u largua nga une , nga shpirti im I mjer, ai murr rrugen te pa kthim ne zemren time la nje plag qe nuk sherohet kurr , dhe tani edhe mos te qajn syte qane zemra ime qe tani as te qet nuk e lejne te loton por endrrojn per nje kohe te shkurte me ato fjale tronditese, po qe edhe te kisha zemer te hekur prap do te rrjetheshin lotete .
Dont, because i have lost at my own will thats what she wanted, she went away from me, from my poor soul, that wall..that one way street left a wound in my heart that will never heal, and now even if my eyes wont cry..my heart which they wont leave in peace but dreams of a short time with those shocking words, but even if i had a heart of steel tears would still flow.

Do te me thahen te gjithe dejzit e zemres dhe trupi tim do te me I vije vdekja dalngadal e ju o njerz ( pa zemer)knaqeni zemren tuaj duke me shikuar duke vdekur dhe lutem ather kur une jam ne mes te vdekjes dhe jetes mos qani per mua. Se mbasi jam nje njeri pa zemer ather ma mira e kesaj jete eshte te zgjedhi RRUGEN E VDEKJES
All the veins in my heart will dry up and my bodys death will come slowly. You people (heartless people) satisfy you heart while watching me die and i plead when i am mid-death and mid-life dont cry for me. Because maybe i am a heartless pereson and the best choice of this life is the PATH OF DEATH.

Tash e perfundoj kete leter me shpres se e ke kuptuar d.m.th.e saj ,mbetesh i pershendetur nga une ,duke te uruar nga zemra gjitha te mira...
Now i finish this letter with hope that you have understood its meaning. i salute/greet you and wish you all the best from the bottom of my heart.

LOL no problem Korcare its all good!

pretty intense letter or what : / lol

thank sooo much you guys are the best haha
oh by the way that letter was not written to me

Originally Posted by Balkaneuro

pretty intense letter or what : / lol

wauw what a letter, but i must ask you is the context of the letter written by a man or a woman,
I understand the words perfectly but i have troubels with knowing if ist written by a man or woman.

thank you!