Stabbing Westward – Good Riddance (To Clarence) lyrics

(Guitar opens, then suddenly cuts off)
Shit!

(Guitar comes in once again, then abruptly stops)
Dammit!

(Guitar once again begins to play, this time continuing on)

Verse One:
Just got five new skill points but they've got no where to go.
Can't even wield a stick; my dex is way too low.
Why did I have to go and run into that wall?
Got no intelligence; I used my face to break the fall.

Chorus:
My fortitude check really sucked, and now I'm gonna die.
I rolled a one with my twenty-sided die.

(Guitar Break)

Verse Two:
My class and race don't go together all that well.
An elf-barbarian's like a wizard with no spells.
My character is a worthless sack of crap.
He's about as useful as a blind man with a map.

(Chorus)

(Violin solo)
*To violin solo* Minus three strength modifi-er...
Could be killed with a pair of ply-ers...

If a smart person's bright, then Clarence is in the shade.
The fact that I wrote this song means I'll probably never get laid.

My fortitude check really sucked, as I start to cry.
I really hate my twenty-sided die.

(Guitar Break)

My fortitude check really sucked, as I kiss Clarence good-bye...
Gotta get a better twenty-sided die.