New Song...No Title Yet

Thread: New Song...No Title Yet

Tags: None
  1. n00b_lyricist said:

    Default New Song...No Title Yet

    Here is another new song (I actually first wrote it a few months ago) that I would love to get some feedback for...let me hear it, both positive and negative...THANKS!

    (NEEDS A TITLE)
    A couple more died today
    Over a thousand totally
    Families left in disarray
    We're winning is all they say

    How long, we're not sure
    What the **** are we fighting for?
    Years have passed, at least two more
    God knows what we have in store

    So grab your gun an tan fatigue
    Tomorrow you leave for the Middle East
    Kiss your kids goodbye
    It's your last glimpse into their eyes

    A war fought for democracy
    A battle, to make the world free
    Maybe we're the ones who need saving
    From our leadership misbehaving

    So grab your gun an tan fatigue
    Tomorrow you leave for the Middle East
    Kiss your wife goodbye
    It's your last glimpse into her eyes
     
  2. Stlawrenceriver said:

    Default

    Wow, awfully depressing really. And straightforward too.
    The rhyme was really well done, not too tacky and the meter was very readable.
    I like the lyrics, but I can't help but wonder to what kind of music would this be set to? The lyrics sound angry and with the short meter it feels fast, but I'm wondering what you were thinking.